The feminine energy chops and changes like the weather - and for a man that is tethered to his women and her emotional roller coaster it's not only confusing, but it is often a cause of anxiety and ultimately draining.
The alternative is to remain secure within yourself and simply watch and observe her changing moods and ideas from a place of curiosity and not judgement. To judge implies one being better than the other. To be curious shows a desire to learn and accept them for who they are at any given moment and for a women to surrender herself to us physically and emotionally she needs to trust that we accept her AND want her for who she is and NOT who we want her to be or what we can GET from her.
This is why as men we need to be both adaptable AND rock solid.
We need to be the lighthouse in her storm.
To an uninitiated man, masculine/feminine polarity is infuriating!
To top it off, one thing that most don't understand (or want to accept) is that the very things that you are attracted to are very likely the things that will frustrate and repulse you moving forward.
An example would be a friend of mine that loves to flirt with men. Her (recently ex) partner would get incredibly frustrated and upset at the fact that she would be openly flirting with everyone.
He told her that it upsets him and that she should stop as it was disrespectful without understanding that it was that very behavior that he was drawn to in the beginning! She was flirting with him and he felt a connection.
Now that they were together he expected her to stop flirting with others even though it forms an integral part of her own self-expression.
She has always been this way.
His insecurity told him that if she did it, that meant that he was being disrespected and underappreciated. He projected HIS own story/narrative about how people should be onto her and then got pissed that she wasn't conforming to it.
Trying to change others is futile. It only serves to reinforce that idea that something OUTSIDE of us needs to change for us to feel better INSIDE.
Our external circumstances need not have any power to change how we feel on the inside.
If you want something to change in your life then the first step would be to change within yourself. The ripple effect of this change can sometimes be dramatic. This is especially true when dealing with the feminine.
The moment you take the pressure off her to DO anything and allow her the gift of space to simply BE herself is often the moment she can begin to relax into becoming more free-flowing and sexual.
Sometimes her own trauma, past and current circumstances seem so powerful that she becomes lost in her own patterns; there is nothing you can do other than to allow space for her to process and come to her own realizations.
An initiated man doesn't need her to do anything.
Only to BE exactly how she is in the moment. No matter what she throws at him he is not perturbed, shaken nor swayed in any other direction other than his own. This can only happen when he knows WHERE he is headed, he has a PLAN to get there and is able to invite her to join him with no fear of possible rejection.
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